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"Humanity is a parade of fools, and I am at the front of it, twirling a baton." -Dean Koontz-

Friday, June 19, 2009

Robert Pattinson’s bodyguard - “Twilight fans!! Ye be warned!”

After being a powerful vampire in twilight, Robert Pattinson thought that he could stop a Manhattan taxi with bare hands, but instead got ran flat by it like a wet bread. Heh heh. I really shouldn’t joke like that. I hope twilight fans didn’t passed out. Come on! It’s a joke! Your Edward Cullen is still alive and kicking, and still leaping around Hollywood in an unimaginable speed.

However, part of the joke is true though. He was indeed got hit by a taxi after filming a scene for his new movie “Remember Me” in front of a bookstore in Manhattan. Don’t die yet, just hear me out okay? And let this story be a good example for all the twilighters around the globe.

Okay now, where were we? Right. When he was filming the scene, a group of hysterical teenage fans gathered outside the bookstore and waited by his trailer for him to come out. I’m sure they have no harmful intentions for the twilight star, but let’s face it. If you’re a hot and have a paleface like a vampire, people will be hysterical whenever they got the chance to be near you. Papparazi and fanatics will follow your breadcrumb trails like zombies and never let you live your life as you like. So you run!

However, when he was running across the street, a taxi driver (probably a twilight hater) hit him on the road. Poor Robert huh? But rest assured. There was no harm done except for some light injuries and cold pounding heartbeats that made him paler than ever. And according for RadarOnline.com who claimed to witness the accident, one of his bodyguards yelled at the girls who suffered a far more serious injury than Robert Pattinson. A disease and I believed that disease is called “I killed Robert Pattinson” disease. Highly dangerous! It could lead to suicide!

The bodyguard yelled, “You see what you did! You almost killed him!”

So dear twilighters, please don’t be so obsessed and let Robert live his free life. Don’t chase him, because you might kill him, and there would be no sequel for twilight anymore. And Hollywood would lose its hottest properties who just got voted as the world’s most handsome man by online readers of Vanity Fair. Now, you wouldn’t want that to happen, won’t you?

1 comment:

  1. Roldan, it's Twihater. This is a full on conspiracy to kill the only living person who matches Edward Cullen description. Besides, it is also a desperate attempt to prove that Robert is not Edward thus he can die instead of just glittering. I think the gals are actually twihaterz and not twilighterz. Them and the cab driver are probably paid a large amount of money. I mean, why would twilight fanatics wanted to hurt Robert? That doesn't make sense.
    Why am I not surprise if the cab driver happenned to be a potterfan and the girls actually have Redcliff as their fantasy? And the bodyguards, they couldn't stop bunch of girls? That's fishy.
    Damn muggles.
    But that just me...

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